Sometimes I check this.

Worst blogger ever.

Crawling & Crying

My mini has been crawling for a week tomorrow. I still keep getting emotional about it. When I see him growing so fast, it makes me cry 

Baby Talk

One of the things I've been tweeting for days is how I've been working on Baby C's sleep schedule. 

I've started trying to cut out the need for rocking, so he's prepared to go back to daycare. 

This is day 3 of me being consistent with it for naps and bedtime and it is going EXTREMELY well. I am so proud of us both. 

Letting him cry it out was very hard, but the cry time is much less now. When he starts getting sleepy, we snuggle a little, I take him to his room, turn on his music, and into the crib with a kiss he goes. 

I'm so happy it's working. I also knew it was time to begin this because he started getting very mean during our normal sleep routine. Trying to jump out of my arms, hitting, pulling hair, & head butting ! It was getting a bit rough ! Thankfully we are making great progress and I no longer give in and pick him up. Go me! 

Just in case anyone ever follows me

Who am I ? 

I am ... 

• freshly 24 years old. 

• recent college grad, January 2013 :)

• a new, proud momma, also January 2013 * 

• a temporary stay at home mom, supported by my loving parents while I search for a teaching job. 

• learning to be independent since my fiancé decided he was going to bail on baby & I. 

• a big sister to a 20 & 18 year old. 

• a god momma to a beautiful four year old. 

• a best friend, to four of the most supportive girls I have ever met. 

• a bit of a hot mess who enjoys a bottle of wine after baby goes to bed. 

• a girl who is trying to figure out the difference between lonely & being alone. 

• a not girlfriend who is catching feelings for someone I keep pushing away. 

• a high strung, control freak. 

• a person full of pent up anger towards "the others" as I like to refer to my son's father's family. 

• a new mom trying to find a comfort zone in this new lifestyle & balance my beautiful baby boy with a professional, personal, and social life. 

This is my place to write the things I may not be allowed to say in any other form. I tend to be misunderstood sometimes or get repercussions from voicing my opinion. I also get mixed opinions from others when I express myself, and I'm tired of that. So here I go taking another shot at this blogging thing. 

xox *

Mom life

I tweet daily about everything my child does. I'm gonna start posting it here cause I'm pretty sure my followers don't care. 

He's just so wonderful I feel the need to tell the world :) 

He is 7 months old & just started crawling, as well as just got his third tooth. Time is flying & I'm trying to enjoy every single second ! 

Stupid Girl

I'm tired of people telling me what I deserve. If I deserve it, why hasn't it happened yet ?

I also don't think I deserve all the things they say I do.

Why did I have to get myself so confused. I was doing completely fine on my own, then I had to go & like a boy again.

Stupid girl.

Basically just making my life more unbelievably complicated than I should.

I need to be alone forever until I get my shit together.

I should not drag a completely wonderful, kind person into this hot mess that is my life.

Fuck.

Evil.

I've recently found out that I'm pregnant, and along with the excitement of this news I've discovered that I absolutely cannot stand anyone. At all. The only person I want to see is an hour away and will probably punch me in the face and then give me the attention and vent session and sense that I need.

I really should not be allowed around people.

But, we find out if it's a boy or a girl tomorrow :):):)

This is also the first time the Internet has heard this news.

ohhh life.

This summer flew by, I don't know how it happened.

I must have missed it while I was working full time & not having a life.

kill me.

i think i miss BK a little today, it's hard to lose your best friend, we talk sometimes .. but it always ends up in an argument. he used to be the only one there for me so it's hard to not go to him with the big stuff going on in life right now "/ also i was looking at pictures since i'm moving my bedroom so i could just be being nostalgic. why must things be so confusing.

insert witty title here

no idea what my problem is today . i'm feeling evil for no real reason. well, i have a few reasons but i'm just being a drama queen as usuallll . i so wish i could have a summer, it's depressing me. I want summer 2007 back, after my senior year . no school, no job, no worriessss. i had money and fun and did not stress. Now, four years later, i have summer classes & a job & in order to do anything fun it will cost me an arm & a leg just to put gas in my car. BOOOOO on this growing up thing. over it .

missing my bestfrienddddd "/

what a day.

so, today is one of those days again .. i quit life for the day.

woke up, ON TIME ! early actually . got ready . started on my way to school (45 minute drive). gas light comes on. bank account negative AGAIN. got lost. don't know how really, thought i was just making a circle cause i had some time to waste & had to figure out how i was going to handle the gas situation. NO i ended up going on a 20 minute adventure complete with panic attack because i thought for sure i was going to break down & nobody would be able to come get me. so, when i finally realize where i am (about 20 minutes from home), it is 9:20, t-minus ten minutes before class. turned myself right around & drove home. i didn't think i was gonna make it & now i've gotta ask my dad for gas money, which is never a good time .. wish me luck !

not to mention, it's the first day of this class .. COOL !

this is the story of my life. i swear.

xoxoxo

Long Time, No Blog ...

So, lots changed.

no more BK . don't wanna talk about it, i'm happy.
new boy in my life =)
poor .
bachelorette party yesterday.
mother's day today.
doing observations at Holy Cross Elementary School.
summer classes start next week.
wedding in t-minus 2 weeks. EEEEEK !!!
missing BB * got to work with her Friday.
life. is. boring.

blah .

if there are any heavens my mother will - e.e. cummings 
 

if there are any heavens my mother will(all by herself)have
one.  It will not be a pansy heaven nor
a fragile heaven of lilies-of-the-valley but
it will be a heaven of blackred roses

my father will be(deep like a rose
tall like a rose)

standing near my

(swaying over her
silent)
with eyes which are really petals and see

nothing with the face of a poet really which
is a flower and not a face with
hands
which whisper
This is my beloved my 

(suddenly in sunlight

he will bow,

& the whole garden will bow)

he's my favorite. 

Technology ...

Well, I am a complete and total technology addict . I spend half my day on my computer, and when I am away from that, my blackberry does not leave my hand. UNFORTUNATELY for me, as much as I love my technology, I tend to have bad luck/be very clumsy. About 2 ish weeks ago, maybe 3, my blackberry broke! The screen just went blank on one side . I could still make/receive calls and texts, but I couldn't read my text messages all the way. This was quite an inconvenience seeing as I spend 99% of my day texting. So, I had to switch to a MUCH less smart phone that used to be my mom's. No qwerty keyboard, barely any internet service, and just overall slow. Anyway, I was dealing with it because I hadn't had time to get to the store and I really thought I was going to have to pay for a new phone, which being a student with just a part time job is not in the budget.

So, as I'm dealing with the dumbphone, my computer decides that it doesn't want to charge anymore. KILL ME! I JUST bought a new charger in like, October, because mine broke ... and now the new one is deciding to do the same thing. Another lovely inconvenience to my story is the fact that when buying my laptop my father got sucked into the MAC craze .. making the closest store a 45 minute drive from my house, not cool. I have been computer-less for about a week. Now it is killing my facebook addiction, but I'm a student and not being able to see all my files and work on my own computer is completely terrible. My dad's computer is not in a comfortable space and dies easily, plus it's freezing in the office and I can't concentrate. My brother locked himself out of his laptop .. don't ask me how, cause I've got no idea how that happens. And my sister's computer, which is ancient and crashes everyday, is the one I have resorted to using.

I really wish that I did not have the worst luck ever . Now, it's off to work.

xoxox

My sister .

So, my sister's fifteen .. and she is HILARIOUS . I swear the kid should be a stand up . She doesn't care what it is that pops into her head, most likely, she is going to say it out loud. It surprises me that at fifteen she is so independent and follows her own path .. not to mention she's also gorgeous & super smart as well (that's cause she's related to me obviously.) Anyway the reason I was inspired to write this blog is because I just found out she has one of her own .. but on tumblr or whatever . & I wanted to share one of her posts that made me laugh .

Sickening. (A rant)

I’m not one for ranting, but this is something I feel NEEDS to be addressed.
Today, I was sitting in my Spanish class, which I don’t enjoy at all, and copying the homework I needed to turn in two periods later, and I overheard a conversation. This conversation was between two girls that I know absolutely nothing about, except, that they no NOTHING about music.
What they said wasn’t even about music I don’t like. It was just so unbelievably wrong, I wanted to throw up.
I will stop building up now. Basically, these girls think The Who and Bon Jovi are the same. WHAT!?
I want to give these girls the benefit of the doubt, because they were talking about who played during halftime at last year’s super bowl, and they thought it was Bon Jovi, but that is STILL wrong. SO WRONG. (it was The Who)
They continued to discuss how much they would love it if Katy Perry or Lady Gaga played during this year’s halftime show. I don’t think they understand the target audience of the super bowl.


..... the kid is an old soul . I don't know where she came from, but I do enjoy her stories <3

that's all . my life is nothing but school & work so not so much to update .

Insomniac .

For some reason I have a problem with staying up way later than I should. I just cannot help it. I tell myself I will go to bed early, then it never happens. uGh . although, tonight I should be okay because it's snowing out, all the schools are closed, except for mine at the moment . I have class at 10am and I am just waitinggg for the email to come. I even stayed in tonight to complete my assignments like a responsible student! Normally, Wednesday is my night to go out BK & BB have off & we get to spend quality time together. But BK is sick & has been all week so he wasn't feeling it & like the procrastinator I am, I had work to do.

Last Wednesday something happend to my poor blackberry =( I have been lost all week without it ! I am like back in the dark ages, the phone I'm using doesn't even have a full keyboard ! T9 is disgusting let me just tell you. My facebook obsession is also taking a hit because this phone is too annoying to do anything online.


So, now I'm gonna attempt to put myself to bed. Wishing for my snow day =)

xoxo

I'm baaaack !

Well, I clearly am no good at keeping up with this blog .. until I have to do something to help me procrastinate =) Currently, I am laying on my bed surrounded by 2 English books, my binder, notebook, and agenda just staring at me.

I also have to get motivated because now Mr. B started up a blog ! So I can't slack anymore.

The Holidays were certainly an interesting time, as usual in my family. My boyfriend (of almost 3 years, BK), had his first experience with my family's holiday traditions on Thanksgiving, and they differ a LOT from his family's. Lets just say, my father is the main source of entertainment & is quite outrageous. And, he also likes to remodel my house when he gets bored so our holidays were spent "under construction" meaning we ate in a disaster area. The family portraits we take every year show the construction zone for the whole fam to see, so classy.

Christmas was small this year, but nice. Christmas eve BK & I went to dinner with my little sister & she kept us laughing the entire time. She always has some crazy stories to tell. I took my sister & brother to get professional photos taken for my parents since we haven't had one in about 10 years, & that one is so disgusting that the only place it ever hung was in my Pop Pop's house. So that present was a big hit. My brother (who is almost 18 btw) got a nerf gun .. needless to say I was getting ambushed all day. 

New Years Eve was very simple even though it was my first one as a 21 year old ! My Best Friend (Big Butt, or BB as I like to call her), and I stayed at home in our sweat pants & stuffed our faces & hung out with my parents. BK had to work til almost 12, so he came over afterwards to watch us be silly.

Other than that life is school & work . woo hoo ! & as you can see from the introduction I'm doing so well at being on top of school work =) Maybe online classes were not the best route for me this semester .. we'll see !

xoxo

oopsie !

i am guilty of blog neglect !

holidays are coming, my family is full of entertainment .. i'll have lots to say then =)

xoxo

Kids Are So Rude

Seriously, I love my elementary school children but from 11 up, I can't take it. If one more child sucks their teeth, rolls their eyes, or argues with me I'm going to scream. It may be because this 2 hour job is after 3 hours with my other kids who know + listen (mostly) to me. But these kids drive me up a wall. They don't listen to a word I say + just take it upon themselves to do what they want, noooo thank you. I am not going to be argued with by an 11 year old because I tell him he can't play tackle football. Ughhhh. They also act soooo tough + then wanna throw a temper tantrum when you take priveleges away, this is the future generation + I'm scared.

I'll have a better update soon, my kids have given me some interesting quotes since my last post :)

xoxo

For Mrs. =)

I've been tagged ! So here we go ...

1. Where do you picture yourself in 5 years?
I will be 26, ew . teaching, that's pretty much the only thing I know. hopeeefully I'll be out of my parents house & have my lovely college loans almost paid off =)


2. What would you do if you won the lottery?
I would pay off school ! & buy a new car & give some to my parents .

3. What is your favorite season?

summer, summer, summer . if it could be summer all year round i'd be in heaven. the cold & wet makes me miserable.

4. What is your favorite sport, if any?
baseball . i love it. the Phillies have my heart ! i absolutely adore going to see games live & i'm my little brother's biggest fan during his baseball season.

5. Do you have any pets?
unfortunately i do not =( we put down our family dog a year ago & i would love another.

6. Where is one place you want to go in your lifetime?
Ireland, more than anything. I also want to go anywhere i get the opportunity to. I can't wait to go back to California.

7. Can you describe your dream home?
something homey, and big ! with a yard, i love my parent's house & i hope to have one like it. although it is always changing because my father loves to renovate !